Welcome to the first edition of LiteralPleasure,
OWMS’ Smut & Sex Toy Pairing Guide!
What am I pairing?
James Deen Realistic Cock aka The Deen Peen
Helena Hunting’s PUCKED
Why Am I pairing it?
James Deen is a deliciously handsome and incredibly popular porn star who treats the women he fucks with respect and who is hot as hell. If you’ve never seen him in action you need to get on tumblr. Oh good god. I’ve just lost you.
You also need to read PUCKED. Like yesterday. It’s great. The heroine, Violet, is pretty quirky and hilarious and the hero, Alex, has a humongous cock. Thus, she names Alex’s penis ‘Monster Cock’ (or Super MC, snuffie, or MC for short). There is actually a scene in which Violet makes a cape for the Monster Cock because it’s a superhero. I laughed so hard during that scene that I had tears rolling out of my eyes.
SO. When I experienced The Deen Peen there was literally *winks* no other book that I’ve read that I could pair it with. Not only is The Deen Peen monstrous, but from my extensive research James himself is pretty adorkable. It was really rough you know, watching video after video, but somehow I managed. The things I do for this blog. Sigh. Anyway, once I got the Deen Peen, this pairing naturally made sense and I knew that I had to re-create my favorite scene. Now that the above photo makes sense, let’s get on to the review, shall we?
BUT FIRST, Get Pucked HERE:
Get the Deen Peen HERE:
James Deen Realistic Cock
company: Doc Johnson
Buy Link: http://amzn.to/1IY5P7f
GOOD FUCK. No, that’s not right. The Deen Peen is a fantastic fuck. It is everything I hoped it would be and more. And it is definitely more: nine inches in length, SIX inches of girth (I measured. You’re welcome. see below), and balls the size of an orange.
I’ve heard some rumblings about the balls being too big. Personally, I thought the balls 1) look great; and 2) serve a very useful purpose allowing you to use them almost like a handle to maneuver the cock up your vag (or ass, whichever). There’s also a suction cup on the bottom that I can tell you works well in the shower.
I tested this thing so hard. Just for you.
During its maiden voyage, I used the Deen Peen with my husband, so technically I had a threesome with JD. I’m just going to start telling everyone that. However, you could easily use this on a solo mission.
When you first open the package the cock sort of smells a little bit – it is silicone afterall – but after a good cleaning with some Before & After Toy Cleaner JD was ready to go, smell-free. The dildo is quite softer than others on the market, and while not the real thing (obviously) the characterization as ‘realistic’ is pretty true.
My husband volunteered as tribute for a side-by-side comparison because, SCIENCE. The real deal is clearly warmer and even softer, but The Deen Peen gets really high marks for its realism. The dildo is also sort of bendable, just like a real penis, and doesn’t jar you like a hard piece of plastic would. I HATE plastic toys for this reason. From just presentation and feel alone, I was thoroughly impressed.
That girth though. Oh-Em-Gee. I wasn’t expecting that. I mean, six inches in girth isn’t really something you encounter daily. Ok. It’s not something I encounter daily. I highly recommend trying James out with a whole lot of lube, especially if you’re not used to something so…uhhh, girthy…..or lengthy, for that matter.
The latter wasn’t my problem *waggles eyebrows*.
Honestly, I was worried it was going to be a little too big, but thankfully there was nothing to be concerned about. Yes, it took a minute or so to adjust (that fucking girth), but once adequate lube was used, it was like it was made for me…and isn’t that the point?
While it’s never going to replace the real thing ( husbands and partners can calm down) adding JD into the mix was a LOT of fun, and it’s certainly a good alternative if you don’t have a partner available.
Sizeable, soft & pliable, the Deen Peen is a Monster Cock worthy of celebration. This monstrosity gets the whole five stars & I highly recommend for one-handed reading. Now if only they could make a Deen Tounge…
And because I can’t help myself,
Here are a few more pictures of James as Super MC: