As a disclaimer I should just start that if you’re a die-hard HP purist, you’ll probably hate me immediately once you realize how this happened. but IDGAF. now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s begin:
In January of this year the hubs and I were house-hunting to buy our first house, which if you haven’t yet done let me just share that it’s a really fucking stressful experience. We were on a limited budget due to the mortgage we were already paying for my student loans. I like to call where my diplomas sit the $200,000 wall.
So, right – stressful.
One night I came to bed and hubs was playing his computer game and somehow Twilight was on tv (I HAVE LOST ALL HP FANS AT THIS VERY MOMENT). I had successfully (purposefully) avoided ever seeing any of these movies until that very moment. but i was tired. so I sat down and watched it. AND THEN IT WAS A MARATHON. the first three movies played back to back and I slapped at my husband’s hand every time he reached for the remote. I was hooked and it was his fault. He would just have to suffer.
SO. it was now 3am. I fell asleep dreaming of Edward Cullen. obviously. The next day I found the other two movies and watched them. Monday I drove to a Walmart and a Best Buy to purchase the entire collection of movies so that I could watch them over and over and over. I was a 29 year old twi-hard. It would have been embarrassing if I cared. but i didn’t.
So i figured I should read the books, BECAUSE I WANTED MORE. and more I got (not like Christian/Ana more, but more nonetheless). so I bought them. and read them. although I wanted to strangle Bella most of the time, which I think is a normal reaction. and then I read them excessively. and watched the movies to the point where they now occasionally skip. This series single-handedly got be through the home buying process. I declared it to be therapy.
At one point it was suggested to me that maybe this isn’t healthy. and I should find something else to read / watch. There may have been begging involved.
AND THEN I REALIZED THAT ROB PATTINSON PLAYS CEDRIC DIGGORY. holy shit. revelation. so I found HP4 and watched it. clearly, I didn’t realize that he dies. that was fucking traumatic.
but I was now in. It was now June and I had scheduled a four day weekend/staycation for myself as a little gift. I read seven harry potter novels over four days, which upon retrospect is a little excessive.
I appreciate hp books. I do. I swear. they have a good storyline, they’re all adventure! and bravery! and friendship! but I swear to god I wanted to stick a fork in my eye and ENDITALL during book 5. that was the worst. #sorryimnotsorry. I moved on to the movies and then really wanted to end it. how awful were they?! I mean, ok, there were a few good moments but like nothing happened the way it did in the books – nothing. even the little things that could have easily been accurate WERE NOT. (i.e. HARRY DOES NOT GIVE THE PROPHECY TO LUCIUS. thankyouverymuch. god i was pissed).
but, um, clearly i was slightly invested. but not like I have been with other books. perhaps I’m just a sucker for a good love story. perhaps I got in the game too late? but regardless, i’m glad I’ve read them – if for no other reason so now I can understand the seventy million harry potter themed buzzfeed articles that seem to be posted daily.
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