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Tag: Drunk Reading

#DrunkReading | The Hangover Review: Kidnapped by the Bil-Lion-aire by Sassie Lewis

Book: Kidnapped by the Bil-lion-aire (Mane Attraction Book #1)

Author: Sassie Lewis

Book Summary:

The moment the curvy goddess walked into the club, Crispin knew he’d found his mate. What he hadn’t been expecting to surround her was the unmistakeable scent of prey.

The Wild-haired and golden-eyed hunk stalking toward Viv, flares an instantaneous attraction which seems to burn her mind…and melt her panties.

How can a Lion shifter convince a mere human she is his destined mate?

Perhaps a little light kidnapping, with a side order of incessant pleasuring will do the trick.

This book contains: a French lion shifter whose philosophy is “I licked it, so it’s mine”; a curvy goddess who insists on calling him Simba instead of his actual name; and all the things good Catholic girls should never do.
If being tied to a bed and pleasured into submission doesn’t get you purring, then this isn’t the pussy for you.

What did I drink?:  cranberry juice and green apple crown royal. DELICIOUS.

How do I feel:  I’m good to go, my friends.

Hangover Review:

ohmygod. This book is the funniest thing I’ve read this year. I can’t decide if it was purposefully funny or not – but it had to have been, at least a little bit. A friend purchased this novella for me because she declared it was worth $3 for her to read this post. Let’s give her her money’s worth, eh?


Vivian and Jo were just headed to the shifter bar to check it out. They had heard of women going missing from this bar, but they weren’t deterred. Nope. The $20 price tag on a glass of wine should have deterred them if not the Bermuda Triangle of shifting bars, but whatever. They went and were there for approximately 5 seconds before Viv runs into Crispin – literally runs into him – and then passes out.

This may be a good time to tell you that I think the title of this book is incorrect. It should be cubnapped, right? RIGHT.

So Viv wakes up tied to a bed with a lion-man between her legs lapping up her cream. She creams a lot. Crispin’s sort of obsessed with it. Lapping and lapping and licking and coaxing. He can’t keep his paws off of her. [omg. I should get an award for lasting this long without punning].

Crispin drinks his cream

I was really perplexed about how Viv just passed out. I mean, she hadn’t even had a sip of her $20 glass of wine, but BOOM, unconsciousness. It turns out when a male lion shifter releases high dosages of mating pheromones, humans have a massive orgasm and pass out. Well then. That could get uncomfortable in normal life scenarios.

shit. I should plan for this.

There is a substantial amount about lion shifting that I was unaware of. I mean, I was totally expecting the claws to come out – I was even anticipating some heavy petting and pillow talk purring – but the blood exchange and barbs took me for a complete shock. It’s apparently a lot like vampire shifting, but with more hair. and penis barbs.

Unsurprisingly, once the change starts to happen, Viv is totally on board. Come to think of it, she hasn’t been tied up for some time. I’m going to pretend that she wasn’t kidnapped, because that part of the story makes me super uncomfortable. ok? ok. Crispy should have just slipped some of his blood in her $20 glass of wine and then they would have lionsnuggled.

Did I mention that Crispin is sort of obsessed with knocking Viv up on the first go around? He can smell that she’s fertile. I’m really hoping that he can only smell her due to his super fantastic lion abilities and I have to wonder if he would have still kidnapped her and declared her his mate if she wasn’t ovulating. I know that always makes me horny. Just say the words:

I mean, damnit, Viv. BAD NIGHT TO GO OUT. I’d gift you an ovulating test for the future, but since you’re already knocked up with cubs (let’s not even think about that birth right now, ok?) it’s a little late for that.

for fuck’s sake. if they look like that, NOW I WANT ONE.

so finally, after the mating, they start talking. Crispin explains that Viv is his mate and that since they exchanged blood and he fucked her with his barbs, she’s a lioness and that they are mated forever. He drops the bil-lion-aire bomb on her, too. Viv makes a few demands of her own – like meeting the parents, a real wedding, and moving into her condo. Good for you, Viv. Stand up to your lion kidnapper husband father of your cubs.

WAIT. If she can see her family again and Crispy owns a penthouse downtown – like, near people – did the news stories just forget to mention that the women who disappeared from this club reappeared pregnant, shifters and mated to rich lions? This is terrible reporting, and totally something that the club should rectify. The women would come in prides and trample each other to get into the club if the men were that hot & rich. But I digress.

This novella is a serial, so there’s a cliffhanger. Viv has never fully changed into a lion, so we have that to look forward to – there’s also the pregnancy, telling of the parents, and then all the normal stuff of getting to know each other. So much can happen.

I was highly amused and purrfectly pleased with how I spent my evening. Was this a fantastic work of literature? NOPE. Did I laugh my ass off while drinking? ABSOLUTELY. & bonus: the puns continued throughout the night.

If I think about this book being written for the purpose of amusement only, then I actually enjoyed it. It’s completely ridiculous and yet sort of fun to read. The lion shifting was amusing – the puns are out of control – Viv struggles with her new lioness self – and I really hate myself a little bit for saying this, but I’d read book 2.

just remember: he’s king of the jungle, baby.

#DrunkReading, The Hangover Review: Thoughtful by S.C. Stephens

Author:  S.C. Stephens

Book: Thoughtful – coming soon on February 24, 2015! PRE ORDER NOW.

Series: Thoughtless

Other Books in Series:

Thoughtless – CURRENTLY ON SALE FOR $.99!!! HOLY SHIT.

I reviewed those here. Go ahead, get caught up. I’ll wait….

What did I drink?: a bottle of Chardonnay. It was from Australia. IT WAS FATE.

How do I feel?: fine. apparently that’s what happens when you drink the whole bottle before 8pm & then stop drinking.

Book Summary:

In Thoughtless, Kiera told her story. Now it’s time to hear from the sexy rock star who captivated us all . . .

The only place Kellan Kyle has ever felt at home is onstage. Gripping his guitar in a darkened bar, he can forget his painful past. These days his life revolves around three things: music, his bandmates, and hot hookups. Until one woman changes everything . . .
Kiera is the kind of girl Kellan has no business wanting-smart, sweet, and dating his best friend. Certain he could never be worthy of her love, he hides his growing attraction . . . until Kiera’s own tormented heart hints that his feelings might not be one-sided. Now, no matter the consequences, Kellan is sure of one thing-he won’t let Kiera go without a fight.


Seeing this story through Kellan’s eyes was so much more difficult than I had imagined. S.C. Stephens packs this book with layers of emotion that get peeled back with each page. I had no idea of the depth of Kellan’s feelings…when they began…and how they took shape. This book gives you all of those answers and I understood Kellan from a place that I hadn’t before.

Thoughtful is everything you were hoping it to be and *double bonus* we get the story without being in Kiera’s head! Sorry, I had to. Kellan’s head is so much sexier anyway. The storyline follows Thoughtless pretty closely, which was fantastic, although I was a little concerned with where SC Stephens was going to leave us. Don’t worry, you get an ending you’re ok with! *deep breaths*

I loved learning how Kellan felt in each pivotal scene: i.e. the Expresso Stand Scene (HOLY SHIT), the car scene, the club scene, & the parking lot scene to name a few. And each one gutted me a little bit more. The emotional connection that I already felt with Kellan deepened substantially with each page. I was hurting for him. I was rooting for him. I was hating Kiera (ok, that part’s not new). It was really lucky I had that bottle of wine nearby. Perhaps they should package a bottle of wine with each book. Because, necessary. I AM NOT EXAGGERATING.

I was trying to update and share my feelings while reading, but I couldn’t give anything that didn’t sound like I was going through a gut-wrenching emotional breakdown. Which, is understandable, because that’s what this book reduced me to. However, it’s not a bad thing. Thoughtful is supposed to be intense and make you a little bit uncomfortable. Seeing these events reflected through different eyes challenged my views on the whole situation. Even though Kellan has been with countless woman, he has a new innocence when it comes to Kiera. It’s adorably sweet….


Thoughtful is the perfect addition to the Thoughtless series. It’s an insightful and emotional journey through Kellan Kyle’s eyes that you absolutely must jump on. Kellan’s vulnerability, strength, and inner struggle are worth the day or so you’ll lose when you read this book – PROMISE. So so good, S.C. Stephens hit this one out of the park.

{I received an ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. THANK YOU.}

#DrunkReading, The Hangover – Songs of Submission Series


Book:   Songs of Submission Series by CD Reiss

There are seven parts to this series (technically 8 w/ the extras in Dominance) I’m reviewing it as a whole because I cannot separate the gloriousness of the entire story.

Beg, Tease & Submit come in a bundle. I recommend buying the bundles because not only will you save money, but you will want/need immediate access to the next part of the story.

Control. Burn & Resist shall be your next necessary purchase.

THEN comes Sing.

Dominance is an extra 70 pages of juicy bits you’ll likely crave after you’re done.

Have I read it before?:  Nope. but I will again.

What did I drink?:  Chardonnay. I have a love affair with dry white wine. I drank it out of my new mug that says ‘I like my drinks strong & my books smutty’ 😉

How do I feel:  Good! happy I didn’t drink more since I was ready to pass out at 10pm anyway.

General Thoughts:

This is one series where the covers of the books actually drew me in. They’re beautiful and sexy and simple. They actually made me want to buy the books. If the covers of these books don’t do it for you, I’m not sure any covers will. Besides the perfect artwork (which is totally frameworthy), this story is amazing. I have no idea how many pages the entire series equals but at the end of last night I felt like I had just finished a marathon. I was exhausted but totally satisfied.


Monica is a struggling waitress/singer in LA. She lives with her best friend and roommate Gabby in a run down house in Echo Park and pays minimal rent to her mother. She dated Darren, Gabby’s brother, for like twelve thousand years, but they’re just friends now. After Darren, Monica dated Kevin Wainwright – a very good looking artist who is now up and coming himself; however, Monica walked out on him a year and a half ago and since then she’s suffering from self-imposed celibacy, focusing instead on her music.

And then we meet Jonathan Drazen. Sweet mother of Christ he is fucking delicious. From the very beginning he kept me on my toes. He was mostly honest but still hid behind a mask. He would do or say exactly what I thought he would, but then in the next second, I’d be thrown for a loop. It was refreshing to read and scorchingly hot to imagine.

Full disclosure, I started this series on Friday while I was at work. I was super busy, but I kept taking five minute breaks here and there to read a chapter. It was my motivation.

By Friday night I had finished Tease. and the way it ends will throw you into a little rage.

I really did workout on Friday night (I’m basically the coolest person on earth) and it really did help fuel my workout. I WAS SO ANGSTY.

Saturday I was sneak-reading all day in between doing other things until finally I decided: DRUNK READING TIME:

I started drinking at the same time that I started the scene after the art show in the bathroom. For those that haven’t read it yet, holy shit. I needed a drink after that, so it was a good thing I had one. The memory of that scene is making me a little hot….[FANS SELF]. The sex scenes in these books are assuredly NOT VANILLA. and i loved every second of it. They are off the charts hot. You want kinky fuckery? C.D. Reiss shows you some kinky fuckery.

A good portion of the storyline is about Jonathan hiding issues from his past and him keeping Monica from meeting with Jessica (his ex wife) to find out what exactly he’s hiding. Monica thinks she’s protecting Jonathan – Jonathan has his own plan. Too bad Monica is only submissive in the bedroom. This causes a little….shall we say, friction?

This series is an emotional rollercoaster. The anticipation of what is going to happen and then what actually happens causes you to gasp and scream but ultimately throw up your hands and go along for the ride.


Being as how I started #drunkreading at 5:30, I started to fade around 9pm…


This series has everything you could ever want in a good erotica novel: depth of characters, really really hot tie-me-up/spank me/bruise me sex, a bit of mystery, a strong independent woman and a complicated, conflicted yet undeniably loving man. AND it’s a mixed POV book. I really enjoyed reading from both Monica and Jonathan’s perspective. My only critique is that by the end of Sing, I really wanted a bit more right before the two year gap. I understand that there was a cliffhanger for a reason, but I felt that the ending was a little bit rushed. Which is probably hilarious to say since the series is lengthy. Maybe I wasn’t ready for it to end? That’s a possibility too, but I don’t know, I just wanted a little something more there. The 8th companion read – Dominance – gives you a bit more, so for that I’m thankful.

If you’re not into a Dom/Sub theme with spanking or a little pain in your sex scenes, you’re not going to like these books. But if you’ve been craving it and haven’t found THAT combined with a good storyline then look no further. THIS SERIES HAS EVERYTHING. ALL THE STUFF. My heart dropped out of my chest, exploded with excitement, and filled with love.This series is one you’ll want to keep for yourself but you know it needs to be shared So, Get it. Read it. Tell your friends. Jump on that emotional rollercoaster.

Drunk Reading: The Hangover // Wallbanger: hilarious, sexy and really good fun


Book:   Wallbanger by Alice Clayton

Have I read it before?:  No

What did I drink?:  pre-gamed with three beers while bowling with the family, then started clearing out those partially used bottles of wine from thanksgiving. I was cursing my mother for liking white zin because I find that stuff repulsive. However, I still killed the bottle.

How do I feel:  Beer before wine – totally fine. Don’t think that’s the saying, but it worked for me.

General Thoughts:

This book is hilarious. Hi-fucking-larious. I have never laughed so hard at a romance novel in my life. Alice Clayton started the book with a bang  – seriously – and I could not stop laughing. For a second I thought I had turned into the Giggler. OH. and there was a SCOTUS reference!!!

If I hadn’t been won over before – that did it right then and there.

Ok, brief synopsis: Caroline moves into a new apartment and her first night there she is introduced (through the wall) to her Wallbanger neighbor, Simon, and his harem of women. Technically, there are only three. Does three make a harem? I should google that. ANYWAY, Caroline nicknames them. She tries to get a glimpse of Simon. She Simon-proofs her bedroom wall after an unfortunate incident with a picture frame.

The build up between Caroline and Simon is adorable, sexy, and just really good fun. It also tortured me a little bit.

oh. and i was getting drunker around the time she agreed to go out with her ex-boyfriend.

Also, to quote Christina Lauren….

And she does. The banter made me laugh while still heating me up in all the right places. There is an inordinate amount of nooking.

AND THEN right at the time when these two Friends-Who-May-Be-More start to get a little closer SIMON DENIES HER. and I about died.

The rest of the book continues the same fantastic banter and funny quips, but also lets us see a little deeper into Simon and Caroline. I loved loved loved this book. I would classify this as a soft-erotica as there is a little bit of action, but it’s no where near the intensity of many other books in the erotica genre. However, what the book lacks in sex, it makes up in humor and innuendo. This book is just FUN and if you haven’t, you must read it immediately. You Will Like It.

(p.s. I can’t thank Alice Clayton enough for writing such a funny book because I was in dire need of some humor after a Thanksgiving marathon family weekend and this DELIVERED. 😉 )

Drunk Reading: The Hangover

Book: Addicted To You by Beth Kery (writing as Bethany Kane)

Have I read it before?:  No

What did I drink?:  boxed wine because i’m all class. When I ran out, I upgraded to a bottle.

How do I feel:  Totally fine. Thank goodness.

General Thoughts:

oh this book is so good. not that i should be surprised, since this is Beth Kery and all. She knows how I like it, and she certainly delivered with this book. I’m giving nothing away by stating that the book opens with an incredibly intense sex scene during which you don’t even know the main female character’s name. And. It. Is. Unbelievably. Hot.

Of course, you eventually learn that Rill Pierce, big time Hollywood producer, has snuck away to Vulture’s Canyon, Illinois to wallow in his own self loathing after his wife, Eden, dies. Katie Hughes, a tax attorney, was Eden’s best friend and the little sister of Rill’s best friend – Everett Hughes, a big time hollywood actor. After eighteen months of Rill’s seclusion from the world, Katie decides it’s enough and goes to him.

I was super concerned that this fancy pants business guy was going to get in the way of Rill & Katie getting together.

But I didn’t have to worry. Katie’s strong and can hold her own. I was cheering for Katie a bit.

Rill can be surly. and brusque. and assholey. But he’s built up quite a wall around his heart that needs to be broken through – but Katie is up for the challenge. However, obviously I reacted a bit during the sweet torture that occurs up to the first time they actually have sex (well, the first time he remembers it anyway)

I loved this story. Not only is the sex hot (let me just say that there’s woods and an outdoor swing) but the characters are well written and you begin rooting for Rill almost immediately. Well, at least I began rooting for him. I love seeing a strong man work through his demons to find light – and I also love hot men who can chop wood and who like to hike. So really, this book hit all of my hot buttons.

Ahh, now on to book 2 in the series – Exposed To You!

Drunk Reading: The Hangover (belated)


Book: Gabriel’s Rapture by Sylvain Reynard

Have I read it before?:  Nope. I started drunk reading about halfway through the book so I wasn’t entirely fresh with the story.

What did I drink?:  WAY TOO MUCH WINE. Thus the belated drunk reading…I purchased a large wine glass for halloween, but decided I HAD to try it out. (pictured below). I drank two of them. HOLYSHIT. I spent most of the night in my bathroom. oops.

How do I feel:  I felt unbelievably awful. I was reminded that I am no longer 21. and I felt that everyone reminded me loudly. My husband made me a greasy breakfast though, which was kind…and it helped. sort of.

General Thoughts:

I should start by saying that whoever placed the Gabriel’s Inferno series on an erotica booklist is an idiot (which is originally how I found it)….This is strictly a romance series – which is totally fine! but when a girl is reading this series expecting one thing and NEVER GETTING IT it can be a little frustrating. Spoiler alert: there isn’t any sex in the first book until page 540. I may have been counting down the minutes.

Anyway, once I started to appreciate the book for what it was and not what I was trying to make it into, I really enjoyed it.

and apparently I was getting drunk rather quickly:

because her name is Christa….but we can go with Christ. I mean, she sure as hell thought enough of herself. I somehow found myself in the part of the book where the characters distance themselves from one another for whatever reason – do you want a spoiler?! I’M TRYING TO AVOID IT. And I was really about to flip my shit:

I quickly reminded myself that I was only about halfway through the series. I’m glad I can calm my drunk self down.

And now you can begin to see not only my dissatisfaction with the way things are going in the book, but also my serious loss of typing skills:

I’ll save you a cliffhanger there – IT WASN’T A NIGHTMARE. goddammit.

And um. that was at 11:30pm. and I was toast. I couldn’t even hold on to keep reading to find out when/if he comes back (super spoiler alert: He does. SHOCK OF THE YEAR). The next day I was hungover, restless, feeling awful, and unbelievably on edge because I didn’t know what happened next. So I did the only obvious thing: I finished Gabriel’s Rapture AND Gabriel’s Redemption. It was necessary.

Overall feelings about the books? It was a fantastic love story that I really enjoyed after I realized it wasn’t an erotica series. It was Twilight love story-esque (that’s a motherfucking compliment from me, asshole) without the vampires. *this is probably because it started out as Twilight fanfiction – but when I first thought that, I actually didn’t know the series’ origin* [here’s where I’m super proud of my gut reaction to things].

I’m obsessed with the classic literature references throughout the books, and the author really took the time to research the topics she was writing about. I loved loved loved that. If you’re looking for a love story that will grip you to your couch for a few days, this is definitely one to grab.

Drunk Reading: The Hangover

Book: Beautiful Bastard by Christina Lauren

Have I read it before?:  Nope – first read. Thanks James at Books-A-Million for helping me narrow down the choices for my new fictional boyfriend.

What did I drink?:  3 large glasses of pinot grigio. there was a point in the evening when I realized I surpassed my last drunk reading PR. I was apparently quite proud of myself:

How do I feel:  Actually not terrible. Woke up at 5:30am with terrible drymouth and a headache. But I downed a glass of water and three Ibuprofens and went back to sleep. Nothing 10 hours of sleep can’t cure. I LOVE LABOR DAY.

General Thoughts:

Well, I actually read the entire book. My husband looked over at me, amused, when I drunkenly declared: “REALLY?!” after closing the last page. As far as smut novels go (don’t get mad, I use that term WITH LOVE), it gives what you expect. and gives it to you early – 

but if you’re expecting Bennett to do anything and everything for Chloe and shower her with love, affection and romance – well, don’t. You will be sorely disappointed. I sort of was. I know that some people found the POV change in the books to be jarring – that actually didn’t bother me and I really like to read from both of the character’s perspectives – but I didn’t always like being in Bennett’s head. Probably because he’s a dick. I mentioned that a few times last night I think:

I was then hopeful – wait! Is this it?! Is this when he stops being a major assface? EVERYONE IN MY HOUSE WAS ON EDGE.

I also had very legitimate concerns:

Bennett comes around by the end of the book, which is great. I wished there was a bit more of that, and I hope there will be in the next one…. but I also kept waiting for the reason that the rest of his family is like the nicest fucking people on earth and he’s a beautiful bastard. but no reason was given. at least in this book. AND THAT KILLED ME. and sort of left me with a bad taste in my mouth (and it wasn’t pinot grigio).

I also felt that there wasn’t full character development in this first book. I don’t know that much about Chloe or Bennett – only that they fuck a lot. While I enjoy the sexcapades as much as the next girl, part of the enjoyment for me is learning about what makes each character tick and then watching them push past their insecurities for something bigger and better: being together. I don’t feel like that really happened here. Although, I will give major credit to the authors for Chloe’s character: she’s strong, awesome, and certainly doesn’t take any of Bennett’s crap. In certain circumstances I liked that. However, I didn’t like the reason they “broke up” (were they ever really “together?!”). I felt that was pretty lame and that Chloe seriously overreacted. I may have to re-read that part to see if I missed something due to drunkenness but I’m pretty sure I didn’t. SorryI’mNotSorry.

There are certainly delicious points in the book. Like, when he let’s his guard down at the hotel – or at his parent’s house – or in the dressing room at La Perla. ALL AMAZING SCENES. But it probably says more about me than about the content of the book that I really connected with the characters when they slipped their masks off and actually talked to each other. I suppose my major complaint is that it didn’t happen as much as I would have liked. 

Sigh. So, I’m withholding final judgment until I finish the series, but so far on my mental ranking of fictional boyfriends, Bennett is nearing the bottom. But before you get too upset – let’s be clear, he’s still on the fucking list.

Drunk Reading: The Hangover

Last night was the first installment of #DrunkReading – where I read or re-read a book while drinking and live tweet my thoughts/reactions. Therefore, that makes this morning my first drunk reading hangover. Don’t worry, I’m already drinking coffee.

Book: Fifty Shades of Grey

Have I read it before?:  Yes. This is the fourth read through I believe. 

What did I drink?:  2.75 large glasses of pinot grigio. LIGHTWEIGHT. my college self is laughingherfuckingassoff.

How do I feel:     As Ana would say: better than I deserve. I woke up with some minor dry mouth and my head is just now starting to pound. I did not have OJ & advil sitting next to my bed when I woke up. Apparently my husband is not Christian Grey. Figures.

General Thoughts:

Well, forgetting the no OJ and advil fact, I’m quite thankful that my husband is so supportive of my ridiculous ideas. He even replaced the small bottle of wine I had originally picked up at the store with a much larger bottle. and then when the drunk reading began, he just sort of left me to it. Also, THANKS VERONICA for drunk reading with me. and thanks for the permission to use our texts on here. I haven’t mentioned that to you? SORRY. you’re hilarious. I’m using them.

I had started to re-read fifty on Friday night. It’s part of something else I will be doing for this blog and I thought it’d be interesting to read it now that I have some perspective. AKA now that I’ve fictionally fallen in love with Gideon Cross over Christian Grey.

So, last night I began when Christian’s mother arrives. 

and then things began to get interesting. I began noticing things I never noticed before and talking about things that bug the fuck out of me. I mean, this book is set in 2011 – I graduated from college in 2006…I had a computer, a crappy one, but a computer for the entire four years of college – WHY DOES ANA NOT OWN HER OWN COMPUTER?! or smartphone? I mean, I get she’s inexperienced in sex but no one said she’s inexperienced in LIFE. COME ON. 

and then, when everyone else probably glanced over the contract. I, like a lawyer freak, grabbed onto it with joy. THIS IS WHAT I DO! and frankly, as I read it again last night, I had to let EL James know I was impressed. It’s pretty legalesey. It reminds me of a similar contract I made with my husband while I was in law school….ohhhh the memories. 

and then something happened. It was like the world shifted. It could have been the couch and the fact that I was super drunk. but I prefer to think that it was the world.

and the Christian hold began to once again take over. 

and apparently I wasn’t the only one. 


what cheeseburger and steak comment, you may ask? THIS ONE:



And yes, to touch on one of Veronica’s points. Ana is annoying. She really is. She’s right up there with Bella. oh wait, THAT’S BECAUSE SHE IS BELLA. Think that one got over on me? No. I’m an internet stalker. I am very aware of MOTU and its outtakes as well as Midnight Sun and its gloriousness. But really, Ana’s internal monologue can get pretty obnoxious, which is why it’s a good thing that Christian is so delicious. 

and so, in the book, they had oysters and wine and wine and wine and sex. and they cuddled and he was mercurial. and my cold cold heart once again melted when Christian climbed back into bed with her. OH JESUS.

So, frankly. this was a very educational experience. Apparently alcohol allowed Christian Grey to again reach his long, skilled fingers into my heart. however i’d prefer those fingers elsewhere….JUST SAYIN’.